Why unsolicited advice is not helpful (and what to do instead) – Integrally Alive Podcast

Instead of talking, listen more. The better way to help anyone is to get curious about them.

What is the worst advice you ever got?I’m going to bet that it was probably unsolicited advice. I think for me it is. On helping, unsolicited advice, listening and friendship… A kind of unsolicited advice that always feels funny to me when I receive it, is about computer and technical stuff. See, not many people know it, but I worked as a web developer, so I know my work my way around computers. And actually for some, I’m kind of a geek; I use Linux, I install it myself, I installed my own website, etc. But the assumption when someone … Read more

How to use curiosity as your door to being unapologetic (and compassionate) – Integrally Alive Podcast

The more curious you get, the less judgmental and the more unapologetic you are.

What is your weird? Do you keep it for yourself like something you’d rather people not see about you?Or do you proudly show it for everyone to admire? I have many, which I share more or less privately. On ladybug, being weird, compassion and being unapologetic… Today I was thinking about someone I met a few years ago in a lovely community.When she arrived, everyone could not but notice she had a Ladybug doll on her head at any time. I literally never saw her without it. She acted like everything was normal, but let’s admit it, everyone was like: … Read more

Is authentic small talk possible? A surprising solution for deep connection – Integrally Alive Podcast

Small talk can be like a "friendzone" barrier in the conversation, or the door to connection.

Can small talk be authentic?Do you enjoy chit-chat? On small talk, the weather, connections, and levels of communication… I don’t. I never did like chit-chat. But I’m proud to say I’m now fluent in small talk. How did that happen? Years ago, not only I didn’t like small talk, I didn’t understand it. I felt like:”What’s the point? I know what the weather’s like. Why are we going to comment on it for 10 minutes? And then… What? Talk about the city I’m from? Yeah, I know it’s the pink city, everyone keeps telling me that… I know it already!” … Read more

A cure for Social fatigue: Deep connection, real fun! meetups – Integrally Alive Podcast

A cure for social fatigue: Un-networking Human meetups

This year has been great for loneliness hasn’t ?But the thing is, while this year and a half now has been really low on opportunities of just meeting and being around people… Meeting and being around people is not the cure for loneliness. It’s not enough!We need meaningful connections. On loneliness, meaningful connections, networking events, meetups, authentic relating, and having fun… I know that well: I’m moving around quite a bit… Usually; These days a lot less. So I’m often the new kid on the block, knowing no one in the place where I just arrived. I visit quite a … Read more

What to say to a friend who’s struggling (And how to ask for help if you are) – Integrally Alive Podcast

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How do you support someone who’s struggling with mental problems? We are only beginning to talk more openly about mental struggles, and there are still many, many misconceptions about it. And often it results in people with the best intentions making the situation worse, by trying to help. So here are a few do s and don’t s, so you can be there for your loved ones when they need you the most… And you can better ask for help when you need it. This article is for you if you’re struggling and want to help people around you help … Read more

Lonely yet not alone… How to create deep connection – Integrally Alive Podcast

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If I told you I have a trusted source of one of the most potent drugs… It’s free, without nasty side-effects, and vastly available… Would you be interested? And what if I told you that you experienced it at least once in your life, and probably multiple times… Can you guess what I’m talking about? Oxytocin! The “love hormone”, that is released every time we have meaningful interactions with living beings. Meaningful interactions? You can be surrounded by hundred people and still lack connection Being alone and being lonely are two different things.We all experienced that being surrounded by people … Read more

How owning our story sets us free – Integrally Alive Podcast

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Is there a story or a situation holding you back from being yourself? Today is all about private speaking and how owning our story, and especially our “one freaking question”, can set us free. For a long time in my life, I had a question I dreaded people would ask me, because I didn’t want to answer. So I would do my best to avoid that question to be asked in the first place. And then when eventually it would come up, I would answer indirectly. I shared in a video about this: my one freaking question (see below). Not … Read more

What leader do you choose to be? – Integrally Alive Podcast

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What leader do you choose to be? (and, by the way: Do you feel like you are a leader?) Is a question that emerged this summer, when I was offered to write a chapter in the book “Ignite for conscious leaders”. To celebrate the publishing of the book, I’m gifting a 1 on 1 session with me: Answer that question in the FB group, and I’ll pick one. I know you can inspire us, and you can be inspired by the tribe… so it might be you, winning the 1 on 1 session and creating your vision in the world. … Read more

Why you need to do what makes you come alive – Integrally Alive Podcast

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How often do you do what makes you come alive? I like to try new things. But some things are so good that I like to repeat them again and again. Like my favorite questions:”What makes you feel alive?” What makes you feel alive? If you’re familiar with the podcast, you will recognize this question: I love it so much, that I used to end every interview of season one with it. And it was beautiful to hear the answers, always different, always inspiring (so much so that I dedicated the last episode of the season to this question alone). … Read more

The foundation for effective communication – Integrally Alive Podcast

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Have you ever found yourself frustrated in a conversation, because it didn’t go as planned, or as it was “supposed” to? Probably the most important thing for having an effective communication was missing… Can we let the intention structure the interaction, instead of letting our agenda limit it? Last week I went to a dancing evening. (I know, how surprising of me, right? 😉 ) The facilitator was talking lots, like they sometimes do in the beginning, to get people moving. Half an hour in, he was still talking, and people were dancing. And he stopped the music. And he … Read more

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